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What was the most damaging event in your life that gave you a negative self-image?

Hm. I would say that my negative self image revolves mainly around me being a stuck-up bitch, though I sometimes like to think that I’m getting better at not thinking that way about myself. The one event that sticks out as really starting that negative thought process for me was I think when I was still in middle school, as a student teacher at my “small-town” (for lack of a better term…) ballet school. I was helping at lessons and rehearsals for a lot of the younger kids pretty much whenever I wasn’t at rehearsals for my own dances. I may have gotten a bit too into it though, because I think I ended up organizing formations and such here and there for my own peers in our dances.

I think this one girl felt I was putting her in the back and putting myself in the front. She ended up quitting, the night AFTER opening night for this performance. On her way out she managed to convey to me in pretty much one word (the “B” word) the reason she was leaving. On a happy note, the rest of my peer group managed to pull through and cover her parts for the remainder of the performances between us. (For the insanely interested, the performance was Sleeping Beauty and the role we had to flail the most to cover was her part of the fairy solos, since she was one of the 6 fairies. yikes!)

Anyway, I’ve had other instances in my life where people have interpreted my actions as vindictive or callous, and I’ve had the opportunity to devote a lot of my thoughts and observations towards recognizing how people can misinterpret each other. I feel like I’ve come a long way.

(Day 3 of 30)